Tag Archives: mum

Kids – sorry the grown-ups broke your EU

Dear kids

Yesterday some grown-ups broke your European Union. Sorry about that. They didn’t really mean to. I hope that you can fix it when you’re older. Remember to vote 🙂

Love, mum

Post-Brexit, I’ve been doing some metaphorical soul-searching. Rummaging around in my drawer of tidy private political opinions. Well, I’ve tipped that drawer on the kitchen table and this is what’s come out. (Some swear-y bits follow below. )

Kids' guide to the EU

This kids’ guide to the EU recently appeared in our kitchen. Great timing.

 

Age-appropriate socio-economic context

I explain the world to my kids with a pinch of age-appropriate socio-economic context. Mentioning background, life opportunities, education, bad luck. I follow up with: “In our house, dad and I think [*insert appropriate liberal metropolitan educated employed opinion*], but there are people who don’t agree. That’s OK.”

Today, a day after Britain voted to leave the EU, bollocks to that nuanced ‘two-sides’ approach. I think that 51.9% of the voters made the wrong decision about the EU referendum. I’m telling my kids that I voted Remain because I wanted them to have the same opportunities that British kids had before them.

Unfortunately, more scared, confused, mean (sorry), arrogant (apologies), wrong (not sorry) people voted Leave. They probably damaged the economy for a lot of us, and they definitely stuffed up the European future for my kids.

More immigrants? No thanks, I’m full.

I’m telling my kids that a lot of nasty people supported a Brexit because they don’t like immigrants. (Of course, not ALL people who voted to leave were bad. Aaaaah – can’t help myself … Sorry.)

Our family is stuffed-full of immigrants. We like to get around, so I’m horrified and disappointed that this debate was so racist and fearful.

The Leave campaign was supported by famous arse-hats. Farage, Trump and a dirty pile of right-wing European leaders talking up the anti-immigration bullshit. These are not my people.

My reactions on Facebook yesterday

1. First thing in the morning – unfiltered emotion.

Went to bed in the United Kingdom and woke up in land of hate and glory. I slept badly, hopefully dreamed that the Remain side would ‘edge’ ahead… Instead I’m now living in Little Middle England.

This morning I had an unexpected cry over politics and unexpected need to share my sadness on social media. I’m not angry. There are apparently enough angry haters out there already and more of them voted. Just sad that being moderate and reasonable and compassionate isn’t good enough anymore.

I’m still glad I supported and voted for Remain. I can tell my kids that.

2. A bit later – after too much information, emotion and social media

My knee-jerk metropolitan liberal elite post-Brexit strategy: combination of stay within safe bubble of left-y urban multicultural suburbs + make sure our kids give a fuck.

European Union 2

Smiling daughter within the European Union. 

Here’s one I wrote earlier

Keep the water in your mouth   Yesterday I found a Post-It note in the kitchen with these words of wisdom: Keep the water in your mouth.

Where do you go when you press Home?  Does your life have a ‘Home’ button? I’m back home (Sydney) after a brief visit to London (new home). My old house is empty and my new house is waiting for me.

To all the ladies in the house

Mother’s Day had serious expectations heaped upon it, such as handmade cards and someone else replacing the toilet paper for once. International Women’s Day? Just the same old fluff – gender parity, equal opportunities, more women in leadership, less violence blah blah.

Here are some words for the important girls and women that I know.

My daughter. I will never be disappointed in you, even if you don’t become the first female astronaut on Mars. (It would be VERY cool if you did though.)

My nieces. Can you hear that? It’s the sound of your big lives starting. Enjoy. I watch with hope and interest.

My female colleagues. You are smart and funny and interesting and ambitious. Please be kind to yourselves.

My lady friends. Thanks for not judging. We’ve got enough to deal with, without kicking each other behind the knees. We do not fight dirty.

My sisters in law. The paid work, the unpaid work, the family, the friends, the home decor – you are totally smashing it. All of it.

My mum. If you don’t want to live with me later on in life, I’ll pick a really good retirement home.

My mother in law. You are the head of a very impressive family of women. You can never have enough X chromosomes.

Pair of finished lipsticks

Finished two lipsticks in one week. Not much comes close in the ‘achievement’ stakes. 

Here’s one I wrote earlier

Judgemental as anything. It’s not cool to judge, unless you are a legal official or preside over hotdog-eating competitions.  Women and mothers – judge me not.

Let there always be kittens. One day I found myself hopping with a clickety click of the mouse from pictures of vintage French cheese labels, to a pro-anorexia, self-harm Tumblr site.  I have never seen one of these before because I am neither interested in anorexia nor self-harm.

 

 

 

 

The Mostly-At-Work-Mum

I’ve recently stopped being a Stay-At-Home-Mum (SAHM). I am now a Mostly-At-Work-Mum (MAWM).

It’s Sunday night. Before I pack my bag for work, I have:

  • tidied away stacks of drawings of ice-creams, love hearts and roses
  • marched up the stairs to tell someone to put away his (Dr Who) Sonic Screwdriver, as he’s meant to be sleeping
  • washed wellington boots
  • found most of the pieces of a (Star Wars) Republic Assault Ship
  • tipped glitter and food crumbs out of school bags
  • secretly recycled even more drawings of ice-creams, love hearts and roses.

[Aside: I don’t recall seeing mums in films doing any of these tasks. They spend a lot of time at kitchen benches slicing loaves of sourdough bread, or washing lettuce.]

During the week, I have outsourced a large proportion of my kid-related responsibilities, so these little things I do at night and on weekends keep me connected with them.

We still have some excellent conversations.

My son’s answer to peak oil and energy resource depletion:  “Buy a load of dead animals and bury them in the ground.”  [This was his variation on the boring old coalification process where coal is formed from prehistoric fossils…]

My daughter was drawing a sea horse. “It’s a French sea horse,” she explained. “Why?” I asked. “Because it’s wearing a bow tie and has a moustache.”  Of course.

So let’s get on with that work-life balance.

Things I say to my kids that my mum never said to me

Here are some things I say to my kids that my mum never said to me. Modern parenting just seems a little more complicated these days …

“No, we cannot buy that on eBay.”

“Go play Angry Birds on dad’s phone. Mine has no games on it.” (I’m lying to them, but it stops them playing with my phone.)

“Who re-programmed the dishwasher again?”

“That’s called ADVERTISING. They want us to spend our money on more stuff we don’t need.”

“I don’t know the answer why. I’ll look it up on the Web later.” (See my earlier post Curiosity killed (by) the Internet.)

“If you don’t finish your homework, you can’t play Star Wars games on the computer.”

“Stop right-clicking the mouse! Use the other finger!”

“No, the Lego company does not use the money we give them to help poor people.” (A true answer to a real question about whether Lego existed to help the disadvantaged…)

“Can you please help your sister find the Angelina Ballerina website? Make sure you turn off that sound!”

“It’s full of chemicals and I don’t think it’s good for you. Have some organic locally-produced cold-pressed vitamin-enriched guava infusion instead.”

“Shall we Skype our friends in America?”

“I’m making dinner. I can’t find Puff the Magic Dragon video on YouTube right now.”

Brought to you by the Interweb – Angry Birds film

Seems like we have so little creative talent left in the world that the Angry Birds app is going to be made in to an Angry Birds film. I wonder if they’ll be producing Angry Birds shaped cheese-flavoured ice-cream snacks for the little ones?